October 9th, 2010 at 8:43 am
this from my mate in India last week before all this rubbish began.
WHO IS JACK SCHITT?
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We’ve all probably said at some point “I don’t give a Jack Schitt” without knowing the origin of the saying. Well, you do now!!
We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, ‘You don’t know Jack Schitt’!
Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, who married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parents’ objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.
Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.
The wedding announcement in the ne wspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world.
He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now when someone says, ‘You don’t know Jack Schitt’, you can correct them.
Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt
Viking2 (2,719) Says:
October 9th, 2010 at 10:21 am
Not withstanding the Dikshit comments the this whole beat up about Henry has become slanted way beyond the truth.
The October 1 piece was followed on Monday by Henry saying Governor-General Sir Anand Satyanand – who was born and raised in Auckland – did not “look or sound like a New Zealander”.
Now having watched TVNZ replay this clip on the news again last night it is clear that he (Henry) did not say that at all.
He asked Key “was the GG a NZer. Key replies and then Henry asked would the next GG be a person who looked and sounded like a NZer”
There was no slur against the present GG merely a fair question about his citizenship. A fair question that many would not know the answer to. It also seems that many Kiwi’s couldn’t have named the GG anyway. (about normal for Kiwi’s)
backster (720) Says:
October 9th, 2010 at 10:29 am
DOUBLE D……somewhere in your genealogy you missed out the birth of a illegitimate child call Dik.
Griff (7,939 comments) says:
November 12th, 2014 at 9:19 pm
I think my wife is a part time Muslim…
Once a month she is offended by everything!
Religious Shit Taoism Shit happens. Buddhism If shit happens, it’s not really shit. Islam If shit happens, it’s the will of Allah. Protestantism Shit happens because you don’t work hard enough. Judaism Why does this shit always happen to us? Hinduism This shit happened before. Catholicism Shit happens because you’re bad. Hare Krishna Shit happens rama rama. T.V. Evangelism Send more shit. Atheism No shit. Jehova’s Witness Knock knock, shit happens. Hedonism There’s nothing like a good shit happening. Christian Science Shit happens in your mind. Agnosticism Maybe shit happens, maybe it doesn’t. Rastafarianism Let’s smoke this shit. Existentialism What is shit anyway? Stoicism This shit doesn’t bother me.
If you do not shit you will die.
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“Shit” may just be the most powerful word in the English language. You can be shit faced, shit out of luck, or have shit for brains. With a little effort, you can get your shit together, find a place for your shit or decide to shit or get off the pot. You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit, find shit, forget shit, and tell others to eat shit and die. Some people know their shit while others can’t tell shit. There are lucky shits, dumb shits, crazy shits, and sweet shits. There is bull shit, horse shit and chicken shit. There is good shit and bad shit. You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, or duck when shit hits the fan. You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle. You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier than a pig in shit. Some days are colder than shit, some days are hotter than shit, and some days are just plain shitty. Some music sounds like shit, things can look like shit, and there are times when you feel like shit. You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the right shit, the wrong shit or a lot of weird shit. You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit, or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle. Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and other times you swim in a sea of shit and come out smelling like a rose. When you stop to consider all the facts, it’s the basic building block of creation.
And then there is Holyshit
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“Shit” may just be the most powerful word in the English language.
What the fuck? No fucking way.
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Jack Shit is a near cousin of Fuck All
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